Rain before social pain

This is my occasional lunchtime-blog-from-the-cafe-courtyard thing. The reason I’m out here in the (lovely, fresh) spitting rain, and not all cozy and warm indoors is that I really didn’t want to sit at an andjacent table to someone I’ve never met, but who I have observed to be a bit of an energy vampire. I know I’m prejudging, but I just didn’t fancy having to deflect the inevitable invitations to be drawn into somebody’s world. Not wanting to be blunt or brutal, I chose avoidance.

The other day I picked up a friend from the gym. As she got into the car, she apologised for possibly being a bit smelly, as she hadn’t showered. ‘Not that you would say anything, of course!’ Which got me wondering, could I achieve that level of social honesty without alienating people? I tried it out, enthusiastically proclaiming ‘whew-ee, what a stink!’ and rolling the windows down.

We’re still friends. I think.

Reticence is better

Just had a conversation in which someone shared with me some fairly personal facts. I thought, some of this is relevant to my experience – perhaps I should add my bit. I thought about it for a while first, but concluded that it’s good to share, even if it’s a bit revealing to do so.

The response to my personal revelation was “Yeah. Anyway…” and on with the agenda, without the faintest acknowledgement of the frankly quite unusual fact I’d just revealed.

My conclusion: just shut up and pretend to listen when self-absorbed types talk at you – possibly mentally composing blog entries to pass the time.