This morning whilst in the process of waking, I had one of those mini-not-quite-dreams – an “information” as my 4yo boy calls them (eg “I can see a green dragon sitting on a blue egg… oh, it’s just an information!”)

My information was this: the angels looked down and were preparing to come and bless my day with love, lightness and joy. And then one of them said “oh hang on, he’s dulled himself with beer,” and another added “we’ll save it for another day then”.

So they passed me by…

If they still have emo bands in the year 2020, I’m sure my son will be singing for one. As I gently encouraged him today to walk the final few steps up a lovely frosty hillside path so we could take a different route down he demanded:

“What about my feelings, Dad? You never think about my feelings!”

I can just see that one fermenting away and coming out again in angsty teenage lyrics…

For the record, my new year’s resolution is to reduce my weekly lunch budget from a potential £30 to about a fiver by staying on top of baking and bringing bread. I have a lump of Emmental in the work fridge to assist with my determination in this matter. Today’s lunch was sourdough with tomato concentrate and Emmental open sandwiches. Lovely.

A potential, beneficial side-effect of this will be having a bit of desk-time at lunch to catch up on life-business like emails, blogging, managing the music career (ha!!!)… etc…

A notable workday moment occurred when I thought I should check up on the welfare of my colleague who hadn’t shown up by 11.30.

- Brring, brring… Hello! Happy new year!
- Hello… you alright?
- Yes, pretty good, you?
- Yep, fine thanks… are you having a sick day today?
- (long pause) Sick day… today…?
- It’s a work day.
- Oh! Um… oh, shit… um…
- Shall I phone up head office and tell them you’re sick?
- Ah… um, well maybe that would a good idea, I’m actually not that well…

I figure he owes me a pint. Maybe three.

Back at work after a lovely christmas break. My eyes are a little tired from general lack of sleep, festive behaviour etc, and I’m really noticing it now, staring at the screen all day.

There is another factor here that contributes a great deal to my ocular displeasure, and that is the Hygenically Clean Cussons’ Carex Moisturising Hand Wash, supplied by the contracted cleaners. Most probably the unspecified ingredient ‘Parfum’ which, let’s face it, could be any bloody thing so long as it smells. Whatever it is, whenever I use it, I’m immediately afflicted with itchy eyes. I generally manage it by using as little of the stuff as possible, but in the interests of hygiene you do have to use a bit from time to time.

My dismay was compounded today when I discovered the latest thoughtful addition to the toiletry supplies. Perfumed toilet paper. Just… don’t get me started…!

I think the reason I haven’t been blogging is that I’ve hit a new level of busy-ness with work. I like my work. It can be stressful, but that’s due to having been given greater responsibility. I am hoping that come review time this translates to greater reward…

I get to do really nerdy things like building sql statements in a java framework, and extracting objects from the result set. I can’t believe people trust me with their systems… I’m afraid I have a bit of a ‘what does this button do’ approach. No major disasters so far though, so I guess it works.

My work is taking me to Belgium next week. The Dutch-speaking part. I’m excited about going to a completely new country (for me, that is… I’m aware that Belgium has existed for some time). I do know a couple of phrases in Dutch, but I don’t think it will be appropriate to try them out on my Belgian colleagues. Maybe after a few Hoegaardens…!

Since my last post, nearly 2 months ago, I’ve hardly cycled into work at all. I need to overcome the hurdle of the crap weather. I do live in Wales, after all… it’s not like the weather’s going to get better any time soon.

But I’ve been blessed with the kindness of two friends from Aus… one person sent me a supply of ‘One Less Car’ stickers… in Welsh! (‘Un Car yn Llai’). Another friend sent me a cycling jersey from a sponsored ride he’s involved in! (I know you both tune in to the blog on the off chance I’ve posted anything, so… thanks guys)

Ok, if there’s no actual condensed precipitation descending on my head at 8.40 this morning… I’ll ride.

– THE OBLIGATORY UPDATE BIT –

I didn’t ride, I lingered over breakfast and said goodbye to old friends I won’t be seeing for a few years… stepped outside and saw a rainbow… drove to work and got (lightly) rained on. And now it is proper raining. So here we are in lovely, soggy Wales, and here comes the tail-end of Hurricane Hanne…

This article in the Independent by Johann Hari got me out of complacency mode and back on the bicycle this morning.

If the environmental arguments aren’t compelling enough, surely the human ones are. People are murdered for Britain’s oil. How do you get away from that?

For example, in 1998, more than 100 ordinary villagers went to one of Chevron’s barges to ask peacefully to speak to the company’s managing director. They were told to wait.

They saw helicopters approaching, and assumed they were Chevron spokespeople – until the gunfire began. Two of them were shot dead. Others were taken away and tortured. The rest managed to flee. A Chevron spokesman admitted the corporation flew in the Nigerian soldiers who did the shooting – and that the protestors they murdered were unarmed.

Now, you may be expecting some tale about how I’ve decided not to waste any more money on cheap, sight-unseen goods off dubious online retailers. But you’d be wrong.

I’ve been trying to coach my son to be a bit more self-reliant getting to sleep, rather than just reading him story after story until he drops off, which is a bit like a sedative, really. So tonight I primed him – ok, I’m going to say goodnight now. I’ll come back in 5 minutes and see how you’re doing. Remember what to do? Close your eyes, relax and think of nice things.

So I came back in 5 (or maybe 8) minutes…

- I’m not having a nice time. I keep trying to think of nice things, but I can only think of yukky things.

Aw…

- Like, what if I fell down off the ladder of my bunk bed?

(Lots of reassurance about railings etc)

- You’re my nicest thing to think about.

Awww….

- You’re off Ebay.

Awwwwww….!

This is my occasional lunchtime-blog-from-the-cafe-courtyard thing. The reason I’m out here in the (lovely, fresh) spitting rain, and not all cozy and warm indoors is that I really didn’t want to sit at an andjacent table to someone I’ve never met, but who I have observed to be a bit of an energy vampire. I know I’m prejudging, but I just didn’t fancy having to deflect the inevitable invitations to be drawn into somebody’s world. Not wanting to be blunt or brutal, I chose avoidance.

The other day I picked up a friend from the gym. As she got into the car, she apologised for possibly being a bit smelly, as she hadn’t showered. ‘Not that you would say anything, of course!’ Which got me wondering, could I achieve that level of social honesty without alienating people? I tried it out, enthusiastically proclaiming ‘whew-ee, what a stink!’ and rolling the windows down.

We’re still friends. I think.

Just had a conversation in which someone shared with me some fairly personal facts. I thought, some of this is relevant to my experience – perhaps I should add my bit. I thought about it for a while first, but concluded that it’s good to share, even if it’s a bit revealing to do so.

The response to my personal revelation was “Yeah. Anyway…” and on with the agenda, without the faintest acknowledgement of the frankly quite unusual fact I’d just revealed.

My conclusion: just shut up and pretend to listen when self-absorbed types talk at you – possibly mentally composing blog entries to pass the time.